Category Archives: Grieving

It’s Official: ICE Has No Shame

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Many of us are troubled by the actions of ICE (Immigration and Customs Enforcement). I don’t think I need to list them, but I recently learned of one tactic that particularly bothers me.

You can read the article here on the web page of National Public Radio.

Turns out when they detain a pregnant unaccompanied minor she is automatically sent to a shelter in Texas (including those who are pregnant from a rape). At first glance this may make some sense: this population has special needs and keeping them together provides them a better opportunity for the care they need. But the reporters spoke to several members of the administration’s own health and child welfare officials who say this facility lacks the ability to give that care.

OK, so why send them to a place that doesn’t provide what they need? These officials (who aren’t identified over a well founded fear of retaliation) are convinced these girls and young women are in Texas because they can’t have abortions.

The Trump administration denies this but gives no justification over why this facility in Texas. Because of Texas’ near total ban on abortions many doctors who care for pregnant woman have left the state out of fear that treating a woman for ectopic pregnancies or miscarriages will leave them vulnerable to criminal prosecution. Simply put, this means that these detainees may be at higher risk for complications to tragic results.

And in case you haven’t had enough, the shelter is run by a for profit company called Urban Strategies. While they claim that the health of their residents is their first priority, the first priority of any for profit company is profit.

Let me be clear: I’m pro life and see the death of any child, of any age, as a tragedy. But I’m also pro honesty and pro integrity. This is neither

By the way, it’s a good article and worth a read.

Remembering Pearl Harbor

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On this day 82 years ago 2532 people woke up on the last day of their lives. In addition to 2,403 Americans, 129 Japanese also died at Pearl Harbor. With every passing year there are fewer and fewer survivors and it won’t be long until the last survivor dies.

It’s a reminder of many things, including the frailty of life and how life can change in an instant. I’ve been blessed to have met 2 survivors in my career in hospice; I’ve also listened to hours of people telling me where they were and what they were doing when they got the news over the radio or from a neighbor. Most had never heard of Pearl Harbor and had only a vague idea that Hawaii was somewhere in the ocean.

The next four years brought out the best and the worst of us as Americans. We kept President Roosevelt’s promise to defeat the fascist empires of Japan and Germany. After the war we rebuilt both of those nations and paid for the education of nearly 8 million of those who fought. On the other hand we allowed our prejudices to imprison over 100,000 people of Japanese ancestry because of how they looked.

To quote Civil War General William T. Sherman, “war is hell.” On Pearl Harbor Day 2023 we see war in so many places (not just Ukraine and Gaza) and it’s a good time to recognize that decisions made today will reverberate for generations to come.

In meantime let us continue to pray for the dead and wounded and may we always strive to be a nation worthy of those who put on their uniform each morning with no guarantee that they will wake up tomorrow.

Gaza: 9/11 Or Prison Break?

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Everyone knows this now but on October 7th members of Hamas in the Gaza Strip invaded and bombed Israel. Since then both residents of both Israel and Gaza have suffered tremendously. Most conflicts these days are complex and confusing and this is no different.

I’ve been thinking a great deal these days how best to encapsulate what is going on and I recently heard a good metaphor: is this Israel’s 9/11 or is it Gaza’s prison break?

First a little history: before 1948 the area we now call Israel was Palestine and while it had a Jewish population it was ruled by Palestinians who were Arab Muslims. After World War II Zionists (Jews who believed they needed a homeland) waged war and conquered Palestine. Most Palestinians fled to the area North and West of Jerusalem (called the West Bank and ruled by Jordan) or an area on the Mediterranean Sea (called the Gaza Strip and ruled by Egypt). In 1967 after the Six Day War both areas were taken by Israel. In 2005 and 2006 governance of Gaza was given to Hamas. Problem is, Hamas is founded on the desire to destroy Israel and return Palestine. Please note: this is an incredibly simplistic explanation.

So if you’re Israel this is your 9/11: Foreign terrorists attacked without warning and want your destruction. They need to be crushed without mercy and taught never to do this again.

But if you live on in Gaza you’ve been imprisoned there since 1948, oppressed and trapped without mercy. The attack was simply self defense in the need to end your imprisonment.

But what now? The lines have been drawn in ways that surprise nobody. Arab nations are lining up behind Gaza and while there is no proof of this Iran may be or get involved. The Iranian government has allied with Hamas. The United States, long an ally with Israel, is backing Israel. Of course since the US has no House Speaker there’s not much we can do but that’s the subject for another entry.

Hamas, for all its weaponry, is small and nobody really believes they can conquer Israel. If Iran and some of the Arab nations band together this could turn into a regional war but there’s been no sign of it and President Biden is working hard to make certain this doesn’t turn into a bigger conflict.

Israel has told people in the northern part of Gaza to evacuate and prepare for a ground invasion. It’s a given Israeli troops will invade Gaza but, well, here we go again. I suspect Israel will find that getting into Gaza will be easier than getting out. While they are there they will be an occupying force surrounded by people who don’t want them gone, they want them dead. It will look like the British army’s occupation of Northern Ireland last century.

In the meantime innocent people on both sides will die. Keep the prayers coming.

The War In Iraq, Twenty Years Later

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The date March 20, 2003 doesn’t sound important and most of us don’t remember where we were, but it is an important date. On that day President George Bush announced that American troops began an invasion of Iraq. It’s a good time to ask why we invaded, what happened, and where we are now.

No understanding of the invasion can be understood outside the attacks of September 11, 2001. On that morning we watched in horror as passenger planes crashed into the World Trade Centers, the Pentagon, and a field in Pennsylvania (that was likely headed toward the White House). It didn’t take long before we learned that the mastermind behind these attacks was Osama bin Laden; he was in Afghanistan being protected by their government.

But not long after these events President Bush and his administration began to push the idea that Iraqi President Saddam Hussein was somehow linked to the attacks. There wasn’t any evidence of this and the Bush administration stopped pushing it but never completely disavowed it. Instead they pushed the idea that Saddam Hussein had both the ability to and intention of attacking us. He possessed Weapons of Mass Destruction, we knew where they were, and we could confiscate them. Further, they claimed that the conquest of Iraq would be a cakewalk. Ordinary Iraqis would see us as liberators. Six weeks later, on May 1st, President Bush announced Mission Accomplished on the USS Abraham Lincoln.

In the years since then we’ve learned that none of this was true. It wasn’t a cakewalk, we weren’t seen as liberators and we didn’t accomplish the mission in six weeks. So what happened?

Today I heard an excellent podcast on this. The podcast is called On The Media and the link to this episode is here. It’s true that members of the administration “cherry picked” information that made their case and they gave too much credibility to sources who made unsubstantiated claims.

But the podcast shows that those behind this campaign felt that the only path to peace for the United States lay in “liberating” nations like Iraq and that the Iraqis suffered so much under Saddam that they would welcome us. President Bush also talked about the “axis of evil,” countries that included Iran and North Korea.

War is horrible and should be used only as a last resort. Saddam Hussein was never a threat and all we did was lose thousands of lives and leave a country that is broken to this day.

We need to remember this next time there is a call to war.

Vin Scully 1927 – 2022

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I don’t normally write obituaries or tributes, mostly because other writers do a better job. But a few days ago we all learned the sad, if not expected, news that Vin Scully passed away at the age of 94.

Full disclosure, I didn’t grow up a baseball fan. I grew up outside of Washington D.C. and it was a football town. There wouldn’t be a basketball or hockey team until 1974, and baseball didn’t return until 2005.

But I moved to San Diego in 1995 and in 1998 I married a diehard, lifelong fan of the Los Angeles Dodgers, I soon learned that their legendary sportscaster, Vin Scully, had been in the broadcast booth since 1950 and would stay there until 2016. Those who grew up with the words “It’s time for Dodger baseball!” will never forget how he made them feel.

It’s a cliche to say this but Vin made you feel like he was sitting next to you and there was nobody else there. He was a wealth of information but he wasn’t just a trivia buff. While all broadcasters know the names of the superstars, Vin knew about everyone. He made a point of knowing the names and stories of those making their debuts. He spoke about them as if he had known them since high school and had been rooting for them all along.

He was also a classic gentleman. Those who knew him spoke glowingly of a man who was just as kind and generous in person as he was in the broadcast booth. Without saying it you could tell that his integrity informed everything about him.

He will be missed. Rest in peace Vin.

And Now Uvalde, Texas. Had Enough? The Republican Party Hasn’t.

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Last week we learned the name of another small city with an elementary school: Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas. In the last 23 years we’ve also learned about Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado; Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut; Marjorie Stoneman High School in Parkland, Florida. There are several more, but you get the point. Each of these schools lost students to gun violence.

This type of mass murder also happens outside of schools as we learned of shootings at St. Francis Hospital in Tulsa, Oklahoma; Tops Friendly Market in Buffalo, New York; Mandalay Bay Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada; Pulse Nightclub in Orlando, Florida. And this is only a fraction.

I wrote a longer article in 2018 and I don’t wish to repeat it here. I argued that it was time to outlaw the purchase of assault rifles. They have no place in legal activities such as hunting. Simply put, they are weapons of war and are designed only to kill a large number of people in a short time.

After every massacre the National Rifle Association and the Republican Party attempt to frame them as mental health issues. This allows them to divert attention away from the guns and their responsibility for the deaths.

After Sandy Hook in 2012 it briefly appeared that the deaths of students that young would shame those groups into talking seriously about reasonable gun control. Alas, no.

As I write this there are some Republicans who are feigning interest in reasonable legislation and I’d like to believe them. I hope I’m wrong.

Kent State, Fifty Two Years Later

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If you’re under fifty May 4th probably makes you think of the Star Wars franchise (May the Forth Be With You) but for older generations it’s a day of mourning.

On May 4, 1970 at Kent State University in Ohio four people were killed by members of the Ohio National Guard. About 300 students were on campus protesting US participation in the war in Vietnam.

They were ordered to disperse and tear gas was used to end the protest. You read the details but at some point several guardsmen fired into the crowd. The four killed were:

May they rest in peace.

Thoughts On January 6th, One Year Later

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On January 6, 2021 I saw something I never expected: A group of terrorists, angry that Donald Trump was not reelected, stormed the Capitol in the hopes of preventing the Senate from certifying that Joe Biden was elected President. You can find an excellent timeline here.

At first even the Republican National Committee condemned the riot. But this was not to last.

In the year since this event Donald Trump has continued to claim he won the 2020 election and virtually all Republicans have tried to excuse or downplay January 6th.

A year later I think we have a few takeaways:

  1. The Republican Party has figured out that democracy isn’t working out for them. Since 1992 the Republican Presidential candidate has won the popular vote only once, in 2004. In 2000 and 2016 George Bush and Donald Trump won the electoral vote but lost the popular vote.
  2. Gerrymandering will only take them so far. For the most part state legislatures determine voting districts and the Republicans currently control statehouses in 30 states. After the 2020 census they are working hard at making sure that congressional districts give them an advantage. Instead of voters choosing the candidates, the candidates are choosing the voters. But there is a problem:
  3. People of color vote overwhelmingly Democratic. Despite all Republican attempts, the United States continues to move from a white majority to a more diverse nation. Children of immigrants who are born here are American citizens and can vote when they turn 18 and Trump’s xenophobia and racism are not lost on them.
  4. Younger voters vote overwhelmingly Democratic. Younger voters generally don’t vote as much as their parents and grandparents but that’s changing. The youngest Baby Boomer (those born from 1946 to 1964) is now 57. Gen X (1965 to 1980), Millenials (1981 to 1996), and Gen Z (1997 to 2012), when they vote, vote Democratic. A child born in 2006 will be able to vote in the 2024 Presidential election.

I believe that if Donald Trump remained in the White House on January 20, 2021 he would never leave. He would attempt to cancel the 2024 elections or at least find a way to win a 3rd term. I believe that would end our democracy.

I also fear that if he attempts to run in 2024 his supporters will do anything to make this happen.

I hope I’m wrong.

Omicron? OMG

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It’s been nearly 2 years since we first heard about COVID 19. Despite the efforts of then President Trump to ignore and deny it, we soon learned it was becoming a global pandemic and needed immediate action. Here in California we were essentially locked down on March 19, 2020.

Following the experience of the flu pandemic in 1918 we hoped that by June we could “flatten the curve” and be in good shape for the expected 2nd wave in the fall.

On June 16, 2020 Vice President Mike Pence wrote an article claiming that President Trump’s leadership will prevent a 2nd wave.

But President Trump, Fox News, and other conservatives have continually discounted and denied the need for social distancing, masks, and vaccines. Simply put, their thirst for popularity, political ambition, and clicks has put us all in danger.

They have blood on their hands.

We are all tired of COVID. We are all tired of masks. We are all tired of restrictions on gathering with friends and family. But here we are in December of 2021 and COVID continues to rule our lives.

First it was the Delta variant, and now Omicron. History students in future generations will wonder why we ignored truth and science.

I have no answer for them.

Saying Goodbye To My Friend Pete

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Last month I learned that my friend Pete Fullerton died of cancer. He had been diagnosed seven weeks earlier and his last journey was, gratefully, peaceful.

If you’re a fan of 1960s folk rock you may recognize him from We Five and their hit song You Were On My Mind.

In the fall of 1983 I was a seminarian with the Stigmatine Fathers, living in Los Altos, California. At the time I took classes at St. Patrick’s Seminary in Menlo Park. As part of our education we were all assigned to a parish. We were expected to participate in the ministry of the parish but we were given some freedom to choose what we did.

I was assigned to St. Williams and St. Nicholas Catholic Churches in Los Altos. I was asked to participate in the youth ministry there; at first I declined because I already had experience in youth ministry and wished to broaden my experience.

Nevertheless I agreed to I meet a couple that lived in the parish and had teenagers in the group. My first dinner with Pete and Sue Fullerton changed my life in ways that continue to take my breath away.

They were raising five children. Pete worked as a security guard and Sue worked in the Catholic school that allowed their children to attend tuition free.

Suffice it to say that they convinced me to participate in the youth ministry program, working with the youth minister Greg Kremer.

In addition to their participation in the youth group they began a charity called the Truck of Love. I grew up Catholic and was familiar with organizations that helped the poor. But Pete and Sue (and others) taught me not only to give, but to give with enthusiasm. They taught me that we shouldn’t give to the poor because we think we’re better than them but that we should give because we are all the equally loved. Generosity isn’t a value but a commandment.

They also taught me that we are called not just to give what people ask for but what they need. Pete taught me to ask “What else do you need?” When people in need ask for something they often ask for less than they need out of embarrassment. But when we tell them that they are loved and deserve what they need we give them the freedom to ask.

One more memory: On June 13, 1987 many of us gathered in upstate New York for the wedding of our friends Greg and Kate. The next day I took a canoe onto Lake Ontario intending a short trip. Alas, I stupidly found myself in over my head when the canoe capsized and I couldn’t paddle back to shore. Greg, Kate, Pete, Sue and several of my friends spent the night praying that I would be found. I spent the night knowing that I was the only person on earth that knew I was alive.

As you can guess I survived, but I learned that those who spent the night not knowing about my survival divided into camps. Some believed I would be found alive and others were preparing for my death. But Pete spent the night telling those gathered that no matter what happened to me they would find a way move forward.

In the years since I’ve often thought of that. So many times I’ve found myself subject to events beyond my control where I expect, hope, or pray for a positive outcome. Pete taught me not to pray for a particular outcome but instead to pray for the strength and faith to accept what happens.

When I learned that Pete was diagnosed with a cancer that infiltrated his brain I called him and Sue. Pete responded, as I expected, with his faith, humor, and love. He knew his days were numbered and decided to live the rest of his life with the love he shared with me.

I pray that when my time comes I will show the grace, humor and love he gave me.